Do you allow extra time to achieve your goal? Or are you really hard on yourself and say, “Nope, I’ve got to do it by ______ (date) or else?”
Or else what?
You’re not perfect so if you don’t achieve it by that date, then do you give up?
And if you’ve been doing that, how’s that working out for you?
How does that help you in the long run?
Do you know why we often set unrealistic expectations – either like when we talked about setting up a too broad goal or this week by unrealistic time expectations? It’s because of…
Perfectionism.
Yep. Anybody but me raising their hand? Both hands?
I’ve been there done that. And still have to catch myself.
Do you ever say, “Okay. I’m going to lose 10 pounds by next week?” And then starve yourself, exercise intensely, and make yourself and everyone around you miserable because you’re miserable and you set up an unrealistic time table?
And then you wonder why you didn’t lose the 10 pounds. And now you just want to give in to the cravings, which will happen, because your body and mind are hating you right now since you’ve been starving them!
Or maybe this is you. You’re experiencing bloating and fatigue, maybe brain fog or painful joints, so you decide you’re going to try to eliminate dairy. (On a side note, yes, dairy may be causing those painful joints because it contains the protein casein which can trigger inflammation which may be causing those joints to be painful.)
So you decide you’ll do it by tomorrow. Let me just say some can do that. But for many, it’s too hard. If you’re used to eating a certain way for so long, then it can be difficult to just change overnight.
No shame or guilt. There’s no point in feeling guilty over that!
Let’s keep it simple – just lengthen your timeline!
Instead of doing it by tomorrow or next week, give yourself two months. Yes, two full months.
Here’s one idea of how to make that work. You simply decrease dairy to twice a day, then the next week to once a day, then the following week to three times a week, then one time a week, and so forth. See how this works. You take more time to allow your body and mind to get used to your new small action step, in this case – decreasing and eliminating dairy for a while.
The mind may be even more key than the body (although they work collaboratively). Research has shown that in order to achieve goals, usually it is 90% mindset. And when we are talking about health goals, it’s the same – 90% mindset and 10% nutrition and lifestyle factors such as exercise, sleep, stress, etc.
But in the example we just talked about, you will also help decrease those strong cravings that make you throw in the towel, reduce overwhelm, and biologically help lessen the withdrawal symptoms. (You didn’t know you can have withdrawal symptoms from dairy? Oh yes, my friend, you can due to the casomorphine compound in dairy, which acts like an opioid. It’s due to the protein casein that I mentioned earlier which is in all dairy products like cheese, milk, ice cream, cow’s milk yogurt, etc.
And sometimes you may have withdrawal symptoms that include anger, irritability, anxiety, and depression. Decreasing dairy slowly will help decrease those symptoms rather than going cold turkey.
Let’s wrap this up. If you want to achieve any goal, plan on increasing the time allotted to achieve it. It’s kind of like building a house. The contractor may give you a scheduled date, but most people know to add two to three months because delays always happen – weather, supply chain issues, sickness or injury of workers, etc.
The same can happen with us as well. We extend the time not only to allow our bodies and minds to adjust, but also for possible life circumstances.
Now, I’m a big believer is setting up a timeline and deadline of when you’ll achieve each step towards your goal. This makes you more accountable and lets you see when you’ve achieved it. Plus, it gives you confidence and helps us know when you are ready for the next step.
But don’t make it unrealistic with too short a timeline, or you will feel discouraged, overwhelmed, and give up.
So this is another way I help my clients in my health coaching programs. By giving you guidance in goal setting and making them realistic but also prompting with some tough love, my clients are able to get where they want to be quicker with me helping them plus with more consistent results.
And if you need one-on-one help, reach out. I’ve got two spots available for private coaching this spring and would love to help you. You can schedule a discovery call to see if we’d be an appropriate fit to work together. Click here to set that up.
Leah Cheshire is a National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach and a speech-language pathologist. She has experienced fatigue, joint pain, brain fog, weight issues, Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis, and IBS and has also worked with clients who have the same symptoms. Using nutrition and lifestyle management, she and her clients decrease symptoms and increase their energy and joy. Contact her here to talk about how she can help you.
